A LOT of Things
by stabbythings
Summary: Heck who in the world expects anyone to come out of there wardrobe, and out of those people who expects that person to be Break and guess who else is in my house? About every male character in Pandora Hearts. Isn't that just dandy? I think so don't you?
1. Of Wardrobes and a Stupid Candy Man

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A LOT of Things

There were A LOT of things that didn't help the situation I could name a few for you, the fact I was only wearing a strapless bra and pajama pants, the piece of candy in my mouth, the song I had been singing, the fact I wasn't hallucinating. Though to get why none of it helped the situation you would have to know the situation wouldn't you? So I'll start from the top.

It was a normal day or so I thought but hey who expects people to come tumbling out of their wardrobes at almost ten O'clock? I sure didn't well any ways, my house was unbearably hot the reason why I was only wearing my pajama pants and a strapless bra. I don't think I need to tell you why I'm eating candy and the song I was singing was _'Nine in the Afternoon'_ so as I walked in to my room to fetch the dishes that I had left in there.

"Back to the street where we began," I sang without a care in the world. "Feeling as good as lovers can" I sang as a man I recognized as Xerxes Break from _'Pandora Hearts'_ rolled out of the wardrobe. I felt my eyes get wide and a blush form across my face. I pointed and began to stutter things I couldn't make out. I fainted promptly; I'm not sure if that's a good thing or not though.

-A wee bit later -

I was on my mattress I must have fell asleep . . . that's when it came back Break came out of my wardrobe he shouldn't exist I should call Jenny . . . yeah I should. I opened my eyes to see Break standing over me. I blinked.

"Er um . . . uh Your Xerxes Break." I said stumbling over my words.

"Yes~ but I wonder how you know that~" Break said in his sing song tone.

"Um . . . uh er lets see umm you are from _Pandora Hearts_ and you should be in your manga not in my bedroom!" I said getting more confident as I hoped off the bed and pulled on the only shirt in here my tube top I noticed I didn't have my candy in my mouth any more. I bet Break took it. I noticed Break was looking at me.

"So I'm going to call my friend Jenny, you can call me Ringo." I said walking out of the room to grabbing the phone and walking to the master bedroom and plopping down on the bed. I dialed Jenny's number and hoped to god she answered for the sake of my sanity. I looked in to the master bathroom by accident and there stood a very bewildered Eliot and Reo as I gazed at them Jenny picked up.

"Hey Ring" She said using one of my many nick names.

"Hey Jenny umm what would you say if oh I don't know Xerxes Break was sitting on my couch and just maybe Eliot and Reo were standing in the master bathroom and when Break rolled out of my wardrobe I was only wearing a strapless bra and pajama pants?" I asked.

"Um I would beat up Break, why?" she said.

"Well er that happened . . ." I said. "I need to start some laundry." I said as I walked to the laundry room and saw Cheshire Neko sitting in the washing machine. "Oh I found Cheshire Neko in the washing machine I'm glad I didn't start that." I said.

"Are you high?" Jenny asked

"Nope wrong friend silly" I said as if this was normal.

"I'm gonna come over and check on you be there in 20" Jenny said hanging up.

"Cheshire could you go sit on the couch with Break I know you don't like him but please?" I asked as I went back to the master bath.

"Er Eliot Reo go sit on the couch please I need to see if anyone else is here." I said pushing them out in to the living room and glancing at the closed closet door. Might as well start here, so I opened the door to the closet and saw Oz and Gil okay that is too funny.

"Hehehehehehe~ to the couch with you I must look for more of you." I said ushering them to the couch and went to look in the other bathroom. I peered in only to see Jack and Glen in the bathtub? Okay that is freaky.

"Umm WHY ARE JACK AND GLEN IN MY BATHTUB SHOWERY THINGY?" I yelled very freaked out.

"Oh hello" Jack said turning around to look at me.

"Hi could you go sit on the couch I only have one more room to look in." I said nicely

"Sure Miss . . . Oh I didn't catch your name." Jack said charmingly.

"Oh I'm Ringo." I said helping Glen and Jack out of the bathtub and in to the living room. I stuck my head in to my brother's old room and saw Rufus leaning against the wall reading a book.

"Excuse me Duke Barma . . . um could you go sit on the couch" I said twiddling my thumbs together

"You must be the hostess." He said his gaze piecing like the 'Shadow King'.

"Yeah that would be me." I said meekly "I don't think there are any more people hidden in my house-" I started as I heard yelling and was that gushing. Jenny must be here. "Excuse me but I must greet one last guest." I said skipping out of the room and throwing open the door and stepping in to the night October air.

"Ringo why is Vincent on the roof and Oscar in your yard you only said Break, Cheshire, Eliot, and Reo where here!" She exclaimed

"Ah come in every one . . . oh um I need a ladder or Vincent is gonna have to jump," I said as I noticed Melina, better known as Shadow climbing up the side of my house with those cup things on plungers. As soon as she got to the top she pulled on Vincent's leg, god I have weird friends how did she get here my green Dodge Viper and Jenny's dark blue Mustang GT both being convertibles. I don't see Shadow's car and Shadow just fell on top of Vincent how nice! Shadow must have parked at Spinx,

"Shadow, get up and help Vincent up and everybody in the house," I said holding the door open as they all trailed in side. Now that everyone is in one place I'll introduce everyone.

"Okay everyone I have lots of names and hate my real one so call me Ringo this is Jenny and this one you would be better off calling Shadow" I said pointing to each friend respectively.

"Shadow I'll introduce you, Break is the creepy one with silvery hair, Vincent is the blonde one with one red eye and one gold eye, Jack is the one with green eyes and a long golden blonde braid, Glen is the one with black hair and purple eyes, Oz is the one who looks like a younger Jack, Gilbert is the one with Black hair and gold eyes, Reo is the one with glasses and black hair, Cheshire is the one that looks like a cat, Oscar is the one with a beard thingy and blonde hair, Eliot is the pissed off one beside Reo, and Barma is the one with red hair." I said pointing and describing each one, I hoped Vincent wouldn't get pissy but I did have red eyes so no room for me to talk.

"Emmi, their gonna need clothes." Jenny said, crap why didn't I think of that?

"Then in that case to WALLY-WORLD!" I exclaimed.

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No I don't own Pandora Hearts thanks for reminding me, if I did I wouldn't be writing this now would I? I don't think so. This isn't even the fic I was gonna work on oh well I like this one better and we go to Hottopic later!


	2. Of Wally World Hot Topic and Wifeys

We had all walked to Spinx and climbed in to Shadow's van as she was going to drive us to Wally-world and then Hot Topic! I had to see Break and everyone else in skinny jeans and I had to buy them clothes I wouldn't be embarrassed by. So they would all be fashionable, I would force it on them and don't think I wouldn't. We pulled up to Wally-world in no time.  
"COME ON GUYS WERE HERE, COME ON COME ON." I shouted like an excited child pulling Eliot out of the car as I opened the door. "WE HAVE TO BUY YOU BATHING SUITS, AND . . . stuff" I said not wanting to go on with the sentence and began to pull Eliot to the entrance.  
"RINGO WHAT DID I TELL YOU ABOUT RUNNING IN TO TRAFFIC" I heard 'Wifey's' voice say otherwise Taylor, gosh we still had our fake, gay, love shape. I was the Pimp, Shadow was the Hoe, Taylor was my Wifey, and Jenny was my Mistress.  
"WIFEY I'VE MISSED YOU" I yelled.  
"Are you really married?" Break asked.  
"No silly, it's from middle school. Taylor is my 'wife' Shadow is my 'hoe' and Jenny is my 'Mistress' we all like guys though we pretend to be gay." I said hoping they wouldn't ask too many questions.  
"Umm Wifey who are all the people coming out of Shadow's car are they some of your cosplayer friends?" Taylor asked.  
"No there . . . We can't talk here do you know a safe place." I said glancing around.  
"How 'bout my van Emmi," Shadow said.  
"Yeah that will work, come Wifey." I said pulling her to the van.  
"Now who are they, are they some of your affairs?" She asked jokingly.  
"There the REAL characters from Pandora Hearts," I said.  
"Um . . . are you sure?" She said.  
"One-hundred percent" I said.  
"If you say so I believe you Wifey" She said climbing out of the car as did I and ran back to the group this time dragging Jack with me toward Wall-Mart squealing like a little kid ranting about how green was so Jack's color. When we got in the store I grabbed a cart and went straight to the men's department.  
"Um guys . . . could I just grab like a zillion packs of Boxers?" I said awkwardly. "Or you could just find your own?" I said . . .  
"Er . . . Em I thought I was the pervy one here." Shadow stated.  
"Okay I'll go look for T-shirts now." I said wheeling the cart toward the T-shirts. I grabbed shirts for everyone. Green for Jack and Oz, Black for Glen and Gil, Red and Gold for Vincent, White for Eliot, and Blue for Reo. I guessed on sizes but heck I'd check in a second. Pants I again guessed sizes and threw them haphazardly into the cart as I saw every one come back and throw various packs of underwear in to the cart. Then we went food shopping trying to get something everyone would eat, I had to buy so much candy and cake mix it was insane I tell you. After that we left and piled the bags into Shadow's car Jenny and I didn't tell them where we were going when the asked we just said 'It's a surprise.' We were almost there I was really excited then again who wouldn't be excited about the possibility of seeing eleven guys hot guys in pants were you could see the assess really well. God I sound like my mother. I might have to glomp one of them.  
"Would you stop bouncing" Eliot snapped at me.  
"I was bouncing?" I questioned.  
"Yes you were" he said irritably.  
"Somebody is a grouchy pants" I mumbled as Shadow looked for a parking spot.  
"Hey hoes." Shadow said.  
"I'm the pimp here" I said jokingly.  
"Okay then. Anyways were here." She said getting out of the car.  
"Yaysies" I said dragging Eliot and Reo right behind him "To Hot Topic!"  
We ran through the mall dragging all eleven PH guys behind us. I squeed as we approached HT. I ran in pulling Eliot and Reo behind me. I went over to look for pants I had half a wardrobe to get for eleven men. Isn't that the greatest? We ended up getting mostly shirts and a few pairs of pants this would last them until we had to buy winter coats though if they wanted to rough it that's up to them. We went to the food court to eat. We left after aimlessly throwing food at eachother though that was fun. Then we all piled in to the 'Mexican van' as Shadow called it. Maybe someone from another fandom would show up soon. That would be kickass.

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Stabby: I don't own Pandora Hearts even if I want it. Anyways Did you like my foreshadowing? So yes there will be a sequel and no one ever gets to leave!

Eliot: WHAT THE HELL DO YOU MEAN NEVER?

Stabby: Just what it sounds like, any ways is Break in character enough and Barma needs to talk more. Though I know he has at least one line in the next chapter. Please Review!


	3. Of The Horrors of Yaoi XD

Third Person

The hostest of the newly dubed 'Mad House' had left for work telling the PH guys and I do quote "If you break tehe anything I'll have your heads" truthfully they didn't exist so no 'real' person would miss them. Now of course the Ph guys had to see what a computer worked soon enough they found er well Fanfiction and stumbled on to the stories about them, soon enough they had found yaoi. Yes now here is how that went.  
Everyone was crowed around the lap top reading the stories about them when "BY ABYSS WHAT IS THIS CRAP" Eliot yelled.  
"WHY AM I KISSING GIL? I'M STRAIT!" Oz exclaimed.  
"MAKE IT GO AWAY IT'S HORRID" Barma yelled "PLEASE MAKE IT LEAVE SPARE MY EYES AND I'M STRAIT BY ABYSS HOW THE HECK DID THE WRITER THINK THIS UP !" Gill yelled.  
After some more reading they stumbled upon a BreakXGil story. This is how that went down.  
"WHAT THE HELL I'M STRAIT I LIKE BOOBS" Break yelled.  
"I SAID IT BEFORE I'M STRAIT" Gil yelled flustered.  
"Um guys what are you talking about?" Ringo asked walking in.  
"We found stories where Gil, Oz, and Break were gay" Barma said.  
"Sounds like a personal problem." The multinamed host said grabbing the phone off the table and dialing Jennys number "Chello?" She said "Ah yeah I have news, they found yaoi" she said giggling. "Well now I know how to keep them in line." She went on "No they haven't found any of those I won't say a word"

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Stabby: Nope still don't own Pandora Hearts. Yes I know it's short don't kill me The next one will be longer, you got two in one day.

Oz: True but that stuff is horrid, how can people write it.

Stabby: I'm fine with it but I knew you would all be scared by it! Bye for now!


End file.
